The Real Housewives of Orange County, Episode 9: "Not a Good Day L.A."
You guys, we need to talk about Lizzie. Seriously. Sometimes I forget that she is even a part of the show. What did she do this episode? Judge some random beauty pageant? Talks about how she wants to have a another baby, but doesn't want to give up her career? I'm asking because I took notes and I still don't remember. Compelling stuff! To be fair, I like Lizzie. She's fun, she's pretty, she's smart. Her husband has edged out Mauricio and Eddie for hottest Housewife spouse, but if she doesn't do something to make herself stand out and fast, she'll be a one season wonder.
The Real Housewives of New Jersey, Episode 2: "O, Christmas Tre"
Who wants to be a member of the Marchese family? Seriously. Their kids are going to grow up to be seriously messed up. It's Christmas time in Jersey, but it's not all fun and games. Disasters happen and the Marchese's want their kids to be ready for anything. And what better way to prepare them then with the fire drill that launched a thousand future therapy sessions. How else to explain all this craziness? A collapsible ladder out the window, Jim demonstrating how "safe" it is. To be fair, when Jim was dangling out the window there was a look that flashed over Amber's face that said, maybe we are taking this too far. Amber did say she used to hate kids and I'm thinking maybe she still does. Maybe that helps explain why she didn't stop the craziness, like when she was blowing the air horn and telling the little ones that they have killed the dog and now mommy and daddy have burned to a crisp. Merry Christmas, Marchese children. There won't be sugar plums dancing in your head on Christmas Eve, instead it will be the charred corpses of your parents dancing while you cry.
The Real Housewives of New York City, Episode 13: "Win, Place or Sonja"
Shortly after this episode aired, I really railed against George. He's an old pervert who gets away with his ridiculous behavior because of his age. I mean, I detest Ramona most of the time, but does she deserve to be talked to that way? Does she deserve to have someone say that if she died he would go to her funeral and fondle her corpse? And why isn't Aviva doing anything about this? If Aviva wants to be buddy buddy with Ramona, why is she allowing her father to treat her "friends" this way? We'll get into that more later.
When I was on a Housewives fansite (don't judge me!) railing against George's uncouth behavior, a commenter brought up Sad Sonja, who was especially sad this episode, again, more on that later. Sonja has dated a 23 year old this season and we have seen her hit on multiple barely legal boys, but no one seems to be batting an eyelash. People laugh it off. Sonja's crazy. It's who she is. Granted, she's not flashing her vagina or rubbing it against people's legs, but she should be absolved. Is she just as much of a perv as George, but she gets a pass?
Personally, I think Sonja is not as bad as George. She is ridiculous, but relatively harmless. George is touching women with his hands and other... things. Not cool. And there is no excuse. Just because he is over 80 doesn't mean that he should be exempt from common decency.
The Real Housewives of Orange County, Episode 8: "Not So Silent Night'
Viewer's don't seem to care for Tamra Judge. I have been a fan. She definitely stirs the pot and causes drama and is ridiculous, but isn't that what people want in a Housewife? Isn't it boring if you just sit there and do nothing? (Hello, Lizzie! I didn't see you there.) This season though, Tamra is getting on my nerves. You'd think, when a friend does something nice for you, like invite you on the show they are guest hosting to promote your business, wouldn't you be grateful? Not Tamra. When Vicki Gunvalson becomes the voice of reason in a situation, then you know there is a problem. So let's take a look at what all went down at Shannon's not so happy holiday party.
The Real Housewives of New Jersey, Episode 1: "What a Difference a Plea Makes"
There isn't a lot of reality in reality television. It's manufactured. "The Real Housewives" is no exception. These women may become friends, but normally their connections to each other are tenuous at best. Part of the allure of "The Real Housewives of New Jersey" is the fact that these women have known each other for years and some of them are family. It lends an authenticity to the show that the other installments of the franchise lack.
Reality has certainly encroached on this season. Towards the end of last season, it was revealed that Teresa and Joe Giudice were facing federal indictments on multiple fraud charges stemming from falsifying tax documents and bankruptcy fraud. There's no way that you can film this season and not touch on these issues and how they are affecting the Giudice family, especially since both Teresa and Joe are facing prison time and Joe could be deported.
The episode opens in February with news of the Giudices plea deal and Melissa and Joey G. watching it on television. Melissa is doing her faux concern thing. She seems even more concerned with looking good for the cameras. She calls Teresa to see how she's doing and Teresa does her "don't believe anything you see or read because it's all lies" thing. According to Tre, they haven't even accepted their plea deal yet. Once Teresa and Melissa are off the phone, things really start to get real.
Anyone who has read my recaps of last season knows that I am not a huge fan of Gia Giudice. She comes off as a spoiled brat. Milania does too, but because of Milania's age, she is able to get away with it. Watching Gia break down over the possibility of losing both her parents and letting Teresa know that she is able to understand and comprehend what her parents are going through melted my cynical Gia hating heart. No matter your opinion of the Giudices (and mine isn't high), you have to feel for their children. Teresa and Joe made their choices and now will have to deal with the consequences, but the girls did nothing.
The Real Housewives of New York City, Episode 12: "Requiem For a Poodle"
So far this season, we have sporadically been introduced to the show within a show, "Sonja is Sad," but this episode was basically a backdoor pilot for that show. So Bravo viewers, is this a show you'd watch on a regular basis. Sonja planning a doggy funeral, veering wildly between emotions. First, she's crying and then she's making jokes. I sort of remember Millou. I get that the death of a dog is hard on people. It's probably harder on Sonja, since she has some emotional issues. It was nice to see the ladies get dressed up in their funeral bests and support their fragile friend.
Producers Are Hoping That Fresh Faces and a Blast From the Past Will Reinvigorate Season 6
Last season of RHONJ was boring. That is not an adjective that you would normally associate with this particular installment of the hit Bravo franchise. Since "The Real Housewives of New Jersey" launched in 2009, fans have come to expect craziness at every turn. We've seen table flips, weaves pulled out, brawls at christenings and some the nuttiest Jersey family drama this side of "The Sopranos," but during season five, it just seemed that we were seeing a lot of the same old, same old. There was the re-heated Gorga/Giudice family drama. Even a brawl between the two Joes wasn't enough to liven things up much. Also, last season, producers were accused of manipulating things more than they usually are. The season finale was especially guilty of that. The scenes filmed at the opening of Posche II were edited so it showed confrontations between cast members that weren't happening, a majority of it was blacked out because troublemakers Penny and her husband Jonny the Greek wouldn't give Bravo permission to show it. Even the reunion was a snooze.
Producers knew there was an issue and it seems they've taken steps to try to liven things up this season. Out are Caroline Manzo and Jacqueline Laurita. Never fear Manzo fans, the Manzo family and Jacqueline will be returning in the fall with their very own spin-off, "Manzo'd with Children." Kathy Wakile has been demoted from full-time cast member to "Friend of the Housewives," and I'm pretty sure the only reason she wasn't given the boot entirely is because of fan favorite, Rosie.
Replacing the departing ladies are Amber Marchese and twins, that's right twins, Teresa Aprea and Nicole Napolitano. Amber is an old friend of Melissa's. She was in Melissa's wedding, but they seem to have fallen out of touch, since Melissa had no clue that Amber battled breast cancer. Her husband is also working with the team that is prosecuting the Giudices. The twins seem like they will be out of control. Nicole is divorced and Teresa is married to a guy she already divorced once. I have no idea how I am going to tell these two apart and having two women named Teresa on the same show. Oy. Recapping is going to be a struggle.
Dina Manzo is back! Now that her sister Caroline is out of the picture, Dina has returned to the show that gave her her start. You may recall that Dina was an original cast member, but she left the show due to trainwreck, Danielle Staub. I like Dina. I always thought she was funny and engaging. I think her friendship with Teresa helps make me like Teresa more. It will also be nice for someone to have Teresa's back.
We can't forget about our returning ladies. Sisters-in-law, Teresa Giudice and Melissa Gorga, are back and are not fighting. Let's hope it stays that way. I'd rather see Teresa and Melissa fight with these new girls, not each other. I don't want to talk too much about the Giudice's legal troubles. We all know it's going on and it will be interesting to hopefully see some unguarded moments where they confront the reality of what could happen if Joe is deported.
All in all, I think we are in for an exciting season that will hopefully wash the bad taste that last season left out of our collective mouths. We'll find out when the sixth season of "The Real Housewives of New Jersey" premieres tonight at 8/7c on Bravo. You can also read recaps of each episode right here on my blog. Hit play below for a preview of the season.
