The Real Housewives of New York City, Episode 16: "Go Yell It on the Mountain"
Why, Kristen? Why did you decide that going to Montana was a good idea? You obviously hate everything about it, even though you are trying hard to convince yourself that you don't. This bringing out a bad side of you. You are being uber competitive with Heather and it just isn't a good look. There is nothing wrong with not rappelling or admitting that geocaching is stupid. It's fine. So, this vacation is a bust. You will plan other trips. I just want to hold you, pat your hair, and tell you everything is going to be ok. Maybe had someone done that this whole episode would have been totally different. Who knows.
LuAnn seems to be the only one of the ladies who is genuinely enjoying the trip out west. She is up early and hiking. She even has a walking stick. A walking stick! She's really getting in touch with her Native American heritage. She's incorrectly making Native American references and when she's corrected she tries to spin it like that is what she meant. She's on fire. I think the Countess should relocate. She could teach the locals all about class and she wouldn't have to worry about facialists spreading rumors about her.
Speaking of the god damned facialist, LuAnn is sick of hearing about her and so am I. This is ridiculous. Stop. Just stop talking about it. Lu needs to build a bridge and move on. I'm with Kristen. This is hilarious and it should be taken as a joke. If Carole can get over it, then Lu certainly can. Ramona is eating up this tension between Sonja and Lu. Ramona is not shy about her feelings for the Countess and the fact that herpuppet bestie is making Lu so upset is delicious to her. Her crazy eyes are rolling around in her head in glee. When Lu acts this way, it just gives Ramona ammunition. Sonja is a terrible friend to everyone but Ramona. I'm not sure why all of a sudden Lu feels the need to try to salvage this "friendship" but it's time to just let it go.
When Ramona and Sonja aren't gleefully cackling about how awful of a hostess Kristen is, a topic I can barely muster enough energy to roll my eyes over, they are disdainfully criticizing every activity that Kristen has planned. They don't like to fly fish, they don't like the cabins, they don't like the food. They basically hate everything. When they go shooting with Carole, they kind of enjoy that despite themselves, but it may be because there are hot shooting instructors to flirt with.
Heather seems to be enjoying herself and she is good at everything. Fly fishing? No problem. I'll catch the biggest fish. Rappelling down the side of cliff. I got this. I'll do it one handed and who needs this safety harness? Kristen has a full mental breakdown. It's obvious that Kristen is trying to prove something to Heather. Maybe she still feels slighted after that mud run fiasco back in episode 3. She is a hot mess. I'm surprised she even made it, but she did. Yay. Lu has a mild freak out, but she does ok. But, like I said, Heather is the super star. I'm surprised she didn't do a back flip once she reached the ground and spit in Kristen's face.
The ladies reconvene after a drinking lunch to geocache. I'm still not sure what geocache-ing is and I don't think the ladies do either. Apparently, people have hid "treasures" around and then you use maps and compasses to find them? I could totally Google this, but I'm not going to. That is how much I don't care about geocache-ing. Ramona is openly complaining about this, which is to be expected. What is not to be expected is Heather following Ramona's lead. Maybe it's the booze she had at lunch, maybe she's annoyed at Kristen for her behavior at the rappelling, but Heather is not having it and she is letting everyone know.
I totally get why this upsets Kristen. She expects Heather to be on her side. She expects that even if Heather isn't really feeling the whole geocache-ing thing that Heather will pretend, but she doesn't. Kristen makes some bad choices here in how she deals with this. She tries to confront Heather, but it's never a good idea to confront someone who is half in the bag. You're fighting a losing battle. A flustered Kristen decides to play the one card that she knows will really get Heather's goat. She calls her bossy. It's a rap. Even in her drunken haze, Heather knows that her lease favorite word has been said. Kristen tries to get the other ladies on her side, but they, smartly, decide to stay out of it. Heather threatened to punch someone and will call someone "motherfucker" if they forget to say please. When no one will join her in geocache-ing or slamming Heather, Kristen angrily stomps off.
So, does this trip make anyone want to go to Montana? Does anyone know what geocache-ing is? Is Heather bossy? Is that necessarily a bad thing? Do you hope we've heard the last of the facialist? Let me know in the comments.
LuAnn seems to be the only one of the ladies who is genuinely enjoying the trip out west. She is up early and hiking. She even has a walking stick. A walking stick! She's really getting in touch with her Native American heritage. She's incorrectly making Native American references and when she's corrected she tries to spin it like that is what she meant. She's on fire. I think the Countess should relocate. She could teach the locals all about class and she wouldn't have to worry about facialists spreading rumors about her.
Speaking of the god damned facialist, LuAnn is sick of hearing about her and so am I. This is ridiculous. Stop. Just stop talking about it. Lu needs to build a bridge and move on. I'm with Kristen. This is hilarious and it should be taken as a joke. If Carole can get over it, then Lu certainly can. Ramona is eating up this tension between Sonja and Lu. Ramona is not shy about her feelings for the Countess and the fact that her
When Ramona and Sonja aren't gleefully cackling about how awful of a hostess Kristen is, a topic I can barely muster enough energy to roll my eyes over, they are disdainfully criticizing every activity that Kristen has planned. They don't like to fly fish, they don't like the cabins, they don't like the food. They basically hate everything. When they go shooting with Carole, they kind of enjoy that despite themselves, but it may be because there are hot shooting instructors to flirt with.
Heather seems to be enjoying herself and she is good at everything. Fly fishing? No problem. I'll catch the biggest fish. Rappelling down the side of cliff. I got this. I'll do it one handed and who needs this safety harness? Kristen has a full mental breakdown. It's obvious that Kristen is trying to prove something to Heather. Maybe she still feels slighted after that mud run fiasco back in episode 3. She is a hot mess. I'm surprised she even made it, but she did. Yay. Lu has a mild freak out, but she does ok. But, like I said, Heather is the super star. I'm surprised she didn't do a back flip once she reached the ground and spit in Kristen's face.
The ladies reconvene after a drinking lunch to geocache. I'm still not sure what geocache-ing is and I don't think the ladies do either. Apparently, people have hid "treasures" around and then you use maps and compasses to find them? I could totally Google this, but I'm not going to. That is how much I don't care about geocache-ing. Ramona is openly complaining about this, which is to be expected. What is not to be expected is Heather following Ramona's lead. Maybe it's the booze she had at lunch, maybe she's annoyed at Kristen for her behavior at the rappelling, but Heather is not having it and she is letting everyone know.
I totally get why this upsets Kristen. She expects Heather to be on her side. She expects that even if Heather isn't really feeling the whole geocache-ing thing that Heather will pretend, but she doesn't. Kristen makes some bad choices here in how she deals with this. She tries to confront Heather, but it's never a good idea to confront someone who is half in the bag. You're fighting a losing battle. A flustered Kristen decides to play the one card that she knows will really get Heather's goat. She calls her bossy. It's a rap. Even in her drunken haze, Heather knows that her lease favorite word has been said. Kristen tries to get the other ladies on her side, but they, smartly, decide to stay out of it. Heather threatened to punch someone and will call someone "motherfucker" if they forget to say please. When no one will join her in geocache-ing or slamming Heather, Kristen angrily stomps off.
So, does this trip make anyone want to go to Montana? Does anyone know what geocache-ing is? Is Heather bossy? Is that necessarily a bad thing? Do you hope we've heard the last of the facialist? Let me know in the comments.
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