Lady GaGa and Katy Perry continued the march to the release of their fall albums by performing at the VMA's this past Sunday. GaGa opened the show and Katy closed the show from under the Brooklyn Bridge.
GaGa opened the show with her face in the middle of a white square cutout. As the camera panned away you heard canned boos and Mother Monster was revealed to be wearing a white, modified nuns habit. GaGa launced into her new single. The performance was full of costume changes as the Lady Germanotta went through different phases of her career from her "Poker Face" video to her "Telephone" wig, ending in the clamshell, Boticelli bikini she sports in the "Applause" video. The performance was a bit more lowkey for GaGa, but I think it worked. I think keeping it simple and relatively low concept served to better highlight the song and the intricate choreography. GaGa definitely got things started on a high note.
The whole show MTV was making a big deal about how Katy Perry was heading to the Brooklyn Bridge for her show ending and show stopping performance. For the first live performance of her biggest selling single so far, Katy emerged in boxing gear in the middle of a gold boxing ring. The boxing setup worked really well considering the songs lyrics, talking about the "eye of the tiger, the fighter." There was some pretty cool jump rope choreography right before the bridge. All in all, both divas helped to make this year's VMA's the best yet.
So, what did you guys think? Did you like one performance better than the other, or did you think that both were the bees knees? Let me know in the comments.
I'm not sure if you know this, but Miley Cyrus performed at the VMA's on Sunday. It was kind of a big deal and got a big reaction from people. I mean, I'm not sure why. It was pretty tame, right? I've never really watched Hannah Montana before, but I assume that this is pretty typical of every episode. I'm kidding obviously. With her tongue and ass hanging out, Miley bid adieu to Hannah Montana and said hello to adulthood.
A lot of people have had a lot to say about Miley and her performance. We have gotten a lot of what you expect. She's a whore, she's a slut, she needs to put some clothes on, she needs to find Jesus. I even read a commentary where someone called her a harlot. I can't remember the last time I heard the word harlot, maybe the last time I read the Bible? There were some other things that people pulled out that I was more surprised about. One of Miley's most outspoken critics was co-host of MSNBC's Morning Joe, Mika Brzezinski, who went on a ridiculous tirade that seemed to go on forever. Here is just a taste of what Mika had to say. "I wouldn't make a joke of it, actually. That was really, really disturbing. That young lady, who is 20, is obviously deeply troubled, deeply disturbed, clearly has confidence issues, probably an eating disorder, and I don't think anybody should have put her onstage. That was disgusting and embarrassing." Whoa, there. A lot to take in. Slut shaming disguised as worry. Some guessing about her mental state and that she maybe has an eating disorder. Whoa.
Now, was I a big fan of Miley's performance? Oh no. I didn't take issue with a lot of the things that people were griping about. I don't care what Miley had on. She's an adult, she can wear what she wants to. If she wants to grind on someone almost twice her age, that's fine, too. No one was holding a gun to her head. If she wants to attempt to twerk with her tongue hanging out, cool. My problem was that the performance itself sucked. There was no signs of talent on that stage anywhere, starting with the vocal. Miley was not on pitch at anytime during that performance. To be fair, "We Can't Stop" isn't a song that really takes a lot of vocal ability. It became more clear during her thin, warbled verse during "Blurred Lines" that maybe the Lady Cyrus should hook up with a vocal coach, stat.
Then there was the air of desperation that seemed to permeate the entire thing. From the moment Miley came on stage in the teddy bear onesie until the time she stripped into the latex halter and hot pants to mime fingering herself with the foam finger, it was all 1-800-TOOMUCH. We get it, Miley. You got a Gwen Stefani hairdo and are singing about drugs. You're edgy. You're not Hannah Montana anymore. The whole thing was akin to a teenager dating someone older just to show their parents how grown up they were. Also, no matter what Miley says, none of it seems authentic. She wants us to believe that this is who she really is, but I'm not buying what she's selling. If you head to dictionary.com and look up "trying too hard" there will be a video of this performance.
So, I'm embedding the video of the performance below if you have yet to watch. Let me know what you thought. Mountain out of a molehill? Should we leave Miley alone? Are you counting down the days until "Bangerz" drops? Sound off in the comments.
Prior to the 2013 MTV Video Music Awards, all the talk was focused on the female performances. Which of the dueling pop divas would "win" the night, opener GaGa or closer Katy Perry? How crazy and out of control would Miley Cyrus be? A few days before the big show, talk turned to this years recepient of the Michael Jackson Video Vanguard award, Justin Timberlake. Little birds began tweeting that during his performance we may be seeing an NSYNC reunion.
The night of the show, there was NSYNC, but there was soo much more. Introduced by Jimmy Fallon as the President of Pop, JT lived up to his title. The performance started with a pre-taped rendition of JT's newest single, "Take Back the Night," then segued to the main stage where JT performed a breathless medley of all his biggest hits. This was the first time that the audience showed any signs of life. Once the familiar strains of "Cry Me a River" started everyone in Brooklyn was on their feet.
Some people complained that the NSYNC reunion didn't last long enough, but I was content. This was giving the highlights. He paid them an homage and then moved on. He also acknowledged them in his speech and I thought that was very nice. Not only did he receive, as he called it, the old person's award, he also took home the nights top honor Video of the Year. Not too shabby for an old guy.
Check out JT's full VMA performance and hit me up in the comments and tell me what you thought.
The Real Housewives of New Jersey, Episode 12: "Hair-Binger of Doom"
The fragile peace that was established between the Gorgas and the Giudices by Dr. V when they were all at their retreat is starting to fracture. We all knew this would happen, though. We all knew it was just a matter of time before things went back to the way they were. We all knew that it would have something to do with the infidelity rumors that have been plaguing Melissa recently and are being spread by her supposed friend Jan and that Teresa is, possibly, complicit in. It all went down at, shocker, a party for Teresa's new business venture. Will this end the recent reconciliation? Let's break down what went down in this episode.
Things were all good when the episode began. Teresa and Melissa were comparing notes and sort of trying to one up each other. Melissa showed Teresa the mock up for her book cover, while Teresa talked about her new line of hair care products named after Milania. Melissa has more than just her book cover to discuss with Teresa, she also has a magazine cover. It turns out that people have been telling their tales of Melissa cheating to InTouch. Melissa is livid, but Teresa urges her to ignore it. At first.
Young women watching RHONJ are learning a valuable lesson. If someone you are dating uses the words "old fashioned" or "traditional" when it comes to marriage, run far and run fast. Kathy and Caroline are learning that lesson the hard way, as their reality TV stardom gives them oppurtunities that they didn't have before and it seems to be bringing out some resentment in their husbands. I'm really loving the friendship that is blossoming between Caroline and Kathy. It seems natural and they seem to bring out the best in each other. Kathy even takes Caroline's advice. She finally stands up to Rich and tells him that she isn't feeling the test kitchen. He hems and haws, but it seems like he understands what she's saying. I loved Kathy in her confessional finally telling any young women watching that a "traditional" marriage is not all it's cracked up to be.
Caroline should take her own advice since Al is still being a giant dick and doesn't show any signs of stopping. I'm not sure why Al is being so dick-ish, or why Caroline keeps defending him using antiquated reasoning. She sounds a little like Teresa defending Joe quite frankly. If there was one good thing that came of Al's continued descent into asshole-dom, it made Lauren realize that maybe she shouldn't be in such a rush to marry Vito (Hey, big guy! Nice to see you!).
It was time for the party to launch Teresa's hair care line, sure, named after favorite daughter, Milania. Teresa had warned Melissa that backstabbing Jan would be there since Jan owned a salon. Does anyone else think that it's time Teresa cut ties with Kim D.? I mean, all she does is cause problems and I don't think she can ever truly mend fences with the Gorgas unless she just bites the bullet and cuts the extension wearing cancer right out of her life. Also, doesn't she know that Kim D. is a witch who steals the souls of children in an attempt to stay young? Run, Milania! Run for your life!
At the party, Teresa urges Melissa to confront Jan. At first the budding author refuses, but then thinks what the hell and tears into Jan. Not much is resolved, Jan continues to make accusations and Melissa denies them until Jan finally sashays away like some overly made up Disney villain come to life. We are then left with Penny, who apparently was at the dinner where everyone was shit talking Melissa. I don't remember her, but apparently, even though she doesn't know Melissa tabloids are still calling her and asking her about Melissa. The whole time this is happening Teresa is right there in the thick of it. At the start of the confrontation, it looks good for Teresa. She encourages Melissa to confront Jan, but once Penny enters into it, Tre begins to look guiltier and guiltier. It's obvious Penny is protecting someone, since she is acting so shifty. It's like Teresa stays because she doesn't want Penny to spill the beans that she is the one that is feeding Penny information to feed to the tabloids.
So what did you guys think of this episode? What was your favorite Milania moment? Mine was definitely the bra. Should Caroline take her own advice? Do you think Teresa is guilty? Can we all agree that Kim D is horrible? How do you think this trip to Arizona is going to go? Hit me up in the comments.
Today is Tori Amos' 50th birthday. She is a musical icon and probably my favorite musical artist of all time. Tori is so many things to so many people. She is an amazing piano player, singer/songwriter, feminist, champion of women, wife, mother. She is an icon. Since releasing her groundbreaking breakthrough album, Little Earthquakes, in 1992, Tori has released 13 albums, along with countless bootlegs and B-sides. Tori isn't just a musical artist who loves her fans and her songs. She is an activist. She has been heavily involved with and a spokesperson for RAINN, the Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network, since it's inception in 1994. She made the ceremonial first call to the hotline. Being a survivor of sexual abuse herself, Tori has always been candid about the experience. Using it to help other victims find peace and rebuild themselves after their own horrific experiences with sexual assault. The a capella, heart wrenching, "Me & A Gun," recounts the experience and the thoughts that were going through Tori's head as she was being assaulted. It is harrowing and heartfelt and perhaps one of the biggest pieces of evidence that Tori is one of the greatest songwriters of all time.
I'm sort of a latecomer to Tori Amos fandom. I really discovered her through my boyfriend and the past three years have been an awesome journey of combing through Tori's huge catalog and discovering these amazing songs, each one touching me and hitting me someplace different. Since I became a fan so late, I, selfishly, hope that she keeps on making music for 50 more years.
If you have never listened to Tori before, I highly encourage you to check her out. If you are a fan of Alanis Morrissette or Jewel or Fiona Apple, you will find that they wouldn't even exist without Tori. I truly believe there is something for everyone. Below, you'll find my picks for my favorite Tori songs from each of her albums via a live clip. There is nothing like watching Tori perform live, whether it's with her band or just her and her Bosendorfer. It was a tough thing to do, but I'm pleased with my picks. Give a listen to each and feel free to hit the comments to tell me about your memories of Tori, how she's affected your life, or just to wish her a happy birthday.
Little Earthquakes
For my pick for her first album, I went with the obvious, "Silent All These Years." There is something about this song that gets me every time. It also features some of my favorite Tori lyrics like, "I've got the AntiChrist in the kitchen yelling at me again." Brilliant.
Under the Pink
Tori's sophomore set contains some classic Tori songs like "The Waitress" and "Cornflake Girl." While those are great songs, my favorite is "Past the Mission" which features Nine Inch Nails', Trent Reznor, on background vocals.
Boys for Pele
This is the album that most Tori fans, myself included, believe is her best. Every song sort of hits you in the gut, whether it's a song about a pretty girl who maybe killed herself or talking to the devil himself. The latter is my favorite song from this record, "Father Lucifer."
From the Choirgirl Hotel
Tori's fourth album is the album where she plugged in and went mainstream, sort of. It is her most commercially successful album to date and if you want to give your friends who haven't heard Tori an album to start with, this is definitely the one that I would give them. My favorite song on "Choirgirl" is a song about a mother who will do anything to protect her daughter called "Playboy Mommy."
To Venus and Back
This was a double album that contained a disc of live renditions of some of Tori's biggest hits and some popular B-sides. It took me a minute to warm up to this CD, but now I love it, especially the sparse, piano ballad, "Josephine."
Strange Little Girls
This was an album that Tori released to fulfill her contractual obligations to Atlantic Records. Rather than release a generic greatest hits compilation, Tori released a cover album of songs written by men about women and performed them from the womans perspective. The most famous song from this collection is her version of Eminem's "97 Bonnie & Clyde", sung from the perspective of the woman in the trunk of the car. My favorite song from the album is Tori's cover of Lloyd Cole's, "Rattlesnakes."
Scarlet's Walk
This was Tori's first album after 9/11. She took listeners on a lyrical journey across the United States. This album contains Tori's most well known single by the general public, "A Sorta Fairytale." My favorite song on the album is the opener, a song about a woman seduced by the world of pornography in "Amber Waves."
The Beekeeper
This album put Tori in a group of women that includes Madonna and Barbra Streisand, women who had scored five or more albums in the top 10. It also includes one of my all time favorite Tori songs, "Sweet the Sting."
American Doll Posse
This was a concept album where Tori played different female characters all representing different archetypes. There were also songs protesting the ongoing war in Iraq and the presidency of George W. Bush. I love the song "Big Wheel" and I especially love this live performance with an introduction by Quentin Tarantino.
Abnormally Attracted to Sin
After a string of high concept albums, Tori went back to basics with this collection of songs. It is not a favorite of a lot of fans and does suffer a little bit from being overly long, but it does contain some great songs, like my favorite, "Fast Horse."
Midwinter Graces
The same year she released AATS, Tori released her first ever collection of holiday songs. There were new tracks along with re-interpretations of classic Carols, including my favorite, "Star of Wonder."
Night of Hunters
For her most recent studio album of original material, Tori linked up with classical record label, Deutsche Grammophone, to record a 21st century song cycle. An ambitious project to be sure, Night of Hunters, follows a woman who leaves her relationship and encounters various creatures that help her on her journey. Tori re-worked classical compositions into her original songs, really showcasing her musical abilities. She was joined on the record by her niece and her daughter, Tash. Here's my favorite track from Tori's best album since Scarlet's Walk, album opener, "Shattering Sea."
Gold Dust
This was Tori's most recent album. A celebration of the twentieth anniversary of her debut, Tori re-worked some of her songs with an orchestra. The result is familiar yet different, thrilling and gorgeous. Here is the single from the album, "Flavor."
So, thanks for reading and watching and hopefully, enjoying. Don't forge to leave some comments and birthday wishes!
Lady GaGa and Katy Perry have been relatively in sync when it comes to their respective new albums. They both made the announcements relatively close together, GaGa was forced to release her new single early after it leaked, they both released their lyric videos around the same time. Finally, GaGa got ahead of her fellow pop star. On Monday, she unleashed the video for "Applause" on an unsuspecting world.
I think that we can all agree that the videos from the "Born This Way" era were rather lackluster. It seems the time away from the spotlight has helped GaGa refocus, because "Applause" is her best video since "Telephone." While it doesn't reach the heights of "Paparazzi" or "Bad Romance" there is still a lot to love in Mother Monster's feast for the eyes. Those bras! The hand bra totally had me fooled at first. GaGa emerging from a top hat. The monster make-up in the cage. GaGa's head on a black swan. Some of the most intricate choreography I've seen GaGa do. The Boticelli-esque clamshell bikini. It is the best kind of video. The kind that magnifies a song and makes it a little bit greater. What did you guys think of the video for "Applause?" Give it a watch and let me know in the comments.
The Real Housewives of Miami, Episode 1: "Til Lies Do Us Part"
Summer may be winding down, but Bravo is attempting to turn up the heat by taking us back to the neon colored beaches of Miami. They've trimmed down the cast (Smile, Karent!, See ya in the kitchen, Ana), but amped up the drama. Mortal enemies, Adriana de Moura and Joanna Krupa, are both getting married, so you know it's only a matter of time before lines in the sand are drawn and sides are chosen. If this episode and the preview for the rest of the season are any indication, sides have already been chosen. I'm not sure why more people to don't watch this iteration of the franchise. I mean, that montage of the women getting ready, Alexia's bedazzled hand mirror with the "A" on the back. It is so over the top and delicious and this looks like it might be the best season yet. So, let's check in with the Mamis of Miami and catch up.
Lea: Speaking of the "Mayor of Miami," we first see Lea Black lounging in the back of her car, waiting for her new bestie, Joanna. As they ride, they talk about Adriana's marriage. Lea is distraught. She did all these things for Adriana because she thought she was helping out her friend, the single mother. This all seems a little shady to me. Lea and Adriana were thick as thieves for seven years. If you are that close to someone, how do you not know that they are married. Something is not adding up here. Could Lea Black be playing the victim this year, after all the crap she threw Marysol's way last season? We shall see. When she wasn't bad mouthing Adriana and lusting after Romain, Lea was re-modeling her house with two very famous interior designers. Don't ask me their names, because I don't care and I wasn't listening. All I could really focus on were Lea's curlers. I didn't realize that A.) anyone on the a Real Housewives show did their own hair, and B.) that anyone wore curlers anymore. Lea skipped out on Lisa's reconciliation cocktail hour, but something tells me that we won't have to wait long to see the former friends have it out.
Joanna: Joanna is still engaged to Romain and is enjoying her new status as BFF to Lea Black. One of the best moments of the episode was when she said that she was Lea Black thirty years ago. Maybe, Lea does need that plastic surgery she is always pooh-poohing. Joanna says a lot, but doesn't do much this episode. She is very verbal when it comes to her feelings about Adriana's marital revelations. She also gets a new car. That Romain, he knows the way to Joanna's heart is not through her vagina, like she wants us to believe, but through Romain's wallet. We also saw some fracturing in Joanna and Lisa's friendship when Joanna first came to Lisa's house. We know from the previews, and the Twitter feud they were engaged in, that, like most Housewives friendships, this one won't last.
Alexia: Welcome back to the show full-time, Alexia. I have a feeling you are going to be a lot of fun, even if your tagline does need a lot of work. "This Cuban doll is back on the scene and living the dream?" Oy vey. Alexia has had lots of issues. Her youngest son, Frankie, was in a car accident that almost took his life, which was the reason she wasn't a full-time Housewife last year. Luckily, Frankie seems to be doing a lot better, even though his accident messed with his impulse center and now he just says what pops into his head. Alexia's oldest son, Peter, has been acting out. Apparently, he beat up a homeless guy, videotaped it, and put it on YouTube. Alexia heard that Lea called her a horrible mother. We were also introduced to Alexia's mother, Nancy. Poor Nancy. She looks like her plastic surgeon is the same one that Mama Elsa used. Yowza. Alexia claims that Nancy is a psychiatrist, but I'm not convinced. She talks about how men do everything better than women and says something about a castration complex. I love how they all just nod along, like, of course, men are better than women. It would be ludicrous to think otherwise. I'm not sure if Nancy is a good influence or not. I don't think a kid who is beating up homeless people needs someone telling him he is superior.
Lisa: Tits McGhee (thank you, Marysol!) is still trying to be friends with everyone. She goes to the Miami Wedding Expo and meets up with Marysol, Alexia, and Ana. Ana is still upset about being cut from the cast. Sorry, Ana. You can't be dull all season, liven up at the reunion and then expect to be invited back. Go be a bitch someplace else. Lisa doesn't tiptoe around Adriana's marriage to Frederic, she brings it right out into the open, even thought the other women play dumb. Lisa was sort of a plot facilitator this episode. She brings up the marriage with Adriana for the first time and she hosts the party that brings all the ladies minus Lea together for the first time. She briefly mentions her infertility problems and has a scene with Joanna that hints at them drifting apart.
Marysol: I know that Marysol is just a "Friend of the Housewife" this season, but as far as I'm concerned she is still an intergral part of the show and she is my favorite. So there. Marysol was giving us comic relief everywhere and was serving backbone realness, which was a nice change from last season. She also brought the ladies back to Earth by giving them a lecture on what really matters. Mama Elsa is in the hospital. She fell and hit her head, causing her brain to hermorrhage. She had surgery and her prognosis is good, but she will be in the hospital. This sobering admission brought the women back to reality and they toasted to Elsa's good health.
So, what did you guys think of the premiere? Are you feeling Miami? Do you think Marysol, Ana, or Karent should have stayed on? Are you Team Adriana, Team Lea, or Team Joanna? Did you buy Adriana's story? Let me know in the comments.
The Real Housewives of New Jersey, Episode 11: "Children of the Scorned"
I feel like Andy Cohen is punking me. We're not quite at the midway point for the season and everyone is getting along. We thought we were going to get a verbal brawl between sociopath Teresa and unhinged Jacqueline, but it was over before it even began. Everyone is getting along. This is not why people watch this show. We want drama. We crave it. I only hope that producers are lulling us into a false sense of security, and some shit is going to go down soon. I mean, if the only altercations are between Gia Giudice and Joey Gorga, then this is going to be a long second half of the season.
We pick back up where we left off, Jacqueline and Teresa, across from each other. Teresa just called Jacqueline evil and I was ready. She is going to go off. I had my popcorn ready. What happened next? Nothing. Nada. Zilch. Zero. Jacqueline calmly tells Teresa that she hurt her. Teresa is shocked. In Teresa's world, she is perfect. People come for her. They try to tear her and her family down. She does nothing wrong. So, how could she hurt Jacqueline? Jacqueline finally starts to show some emotion when she confronts Teresa about how she said Jacqueline needs to stay off Twitter and worry about her son. This brings up something all Housewife watchers are familiar with. Say what you want about me, but leave my kids alone. Yadda, yadda, yadda. What is going to come of this? We may not be able to be friends like we were, but we can be civil. Ah, the civility compromise. Let's hope it doesn't last. I want to see these two go at it.
The ladies join their husbands, stopping Juicy Joe from making anymore cringe inducing statements about people with autism. Seriously, it's like Juicy watched three episodes of The Big Bang Theory and thinks he is an autism expert. I'm sure that one of the people Juicy mentioned who he knows with autism is Sheldon Cooper. Then, Juicy displays more bi-polar behavior when he tells Jacqueline that all is forgiven and forgotten when she apologizes for spreading the cheating "rumors." Oy vey. This guy. Maybe that knock on the head from a couple seasons ago did more damage than we thought.
Apparently, blk. water is still a thing. The Manzo brothers and Chris have a meeting in their new office. Which is really nice and big, but completely empty. Is this a real business? I mean, Chris acts like it is, and he's all concerned that his nephews will spend more time on Little Town. I'm thinking this might be a front. Will Chris Laurita be the next cast member to be indicted?
We were treated to some uncle/niece bonding time as Joey took horrible, obnoxious Gia go karting. I understand that Gia is a teenager, and this is how teenagers act, but I feel like Gia is worse. A lot of this is Teresa's fault. Teresa acts like Gia just finds this stuff out, but Teresa puts her in the thick of it. So, when she talks to Joe about how Melissa intstigated and brings up the christening, you know that stuff came directly from Teresa , which is not cool or appropriate. Zio Joe handles this all very well, basically telling Gia that it's adult business and he takes reponsibility without blaming Teresa. Good job, Joey.
All the Housewives, minus Caroline, get together to go to a Zumba for charity event. It's all pretty boring. It is pretty awkward when the Lauritas and the Wakiles show up, especially since they haven't seen the kids for a couple of years. Teresa and Jacqueline have another moment after Zumba is over. It doesn't seem real at all and when Teresa goes in for a hug, Jacqueline looks like a scared animal, ready to bolt at any moment. The best moment of the episode came from Milania, not a big surprise there. There is a pole on the bus that took everyone to the event. Juicy is ribbing Melissa about showing everyone her moves. She won't. Milania takes some initiative and starts climbing the pole. "Look, I'm Melissa! I'm on the pole!" LOL.
This episode saw everyone saying good-bye to Chris and Albie's gay roommate, Greg. We all love Greg. He was a great addition to the show and I hope the boys are right, and he ends up back in Jersey. It was a nice moment at dinner when Caroline teared up. She really loves Greg and I can relate. One of my best friend's mom's is like my second mom, so it struck a chord with me. Also, if it wasn't for this party, Caroline would have gotten zero screen time this whole episode.
Jacqueline's getting a tummy tuck, y'all! Who needs to diet and exercise when you can just go under the knife, amiright? Jacqueline is going all the way to Beverly Hills to get a little nip and a little tuck. Her parents and Ashley are going to meet her there. Ashley. Wow, we haven't seen that mess in a while, and guess what? She is less of a mess. She actually tries to keep quesadilla mowing, tequila swilling Jacqueline from ignoring docor's orders. A valiant attempt Ash, but a lot has changed since you were living in Jersey.
So, Jacqueline goes under the knife. I'm pretty sure that Jacqueline got her plastic surgeon's number from the guy selling her knock off Louis Vuitton's. What was this guy's deal? He was perving on Ashley and talking about how he hoped Jacqueline didn't want a body like Ashley's. I mean, Ashley is a hot 21-year-old piece and Jacqueline is over 40. Gross. Speaking of gross, how about that shot of the triangles of fat, one of them featuring Jacqueline's tattoo? I wonder if those will find their way onto the Watch What Happens Live clubhouse shelf, next to Tamra Judge's breast implants.
So, everything turns out well. Jacqueline can continue to not exercise, but be skinny. Yay!
So, what did you guys think of this episode? Do you hate Gia, too? Will you miss Greg? Do you Zumba? Will Jacqueline and Teresa be BFF's again? Would you want your plastic surgeon perving on your daughter while he was operating on you? Sound off in the comments.
Kid Cudi's Indicud is one of 2012's underrated albums for me. It was released to mixed reviews, but upon repeated listening I have found a diamond in the rough. A self produced album that mixes dark beats with relatively upbeat lyrics. There are a couple of songs where Cudi is an afterthought on his own album. One of my favorite tracks on the album is "Red Eye," one of the aforementioned tracks where Cudi cedes the spotlight to another artist. In the case of "Red Eye", the artist is HAIM, a trio of sisters from Los Angeles.
HAIM consists of sisters Este, Alana, and Danielle Haim, along with drummer Dash Hutton. They are a great mishmash of modern sounding Fleetwood Mac-style guitar driven pop with some nineties style R&B. So, it's catnip to me. HAIM has released an EP called Forever, along with a handful of singles. Every song is a winner, especially the single that is being used to promote their full length debut, Days Are Gone, "The Wire." They have opened for Mumford & Sons and Florence & the Machine. They have also been blowing audiences away at festival appearances, most recently at Lollapalooza, where SPIN magazine called their set one of the 10 best of the day.
I've embedded some of their videos below, so give them a listen and let me know what you think in the comments.
The Real Housewives of New Jersey, Episode 10: "Best Frenemies Forever"
So, the reconciliation tour continues. Seriously, I'm all for the Gorgas and the Giudices resolving their ridiculous feuds, but this shiny, happy people stuff is going to get real old, real fast. I mean, we were treated to our first lovey dovey Gorga/Giudice family dinner and just when I thought I was going to get a toothache from all the sweetness, I remembered that Jacqueline is still a little nuts. So, we can at least hope for that to keep us entertained for the rest of the season, can't we? Also, this detante can't last for 10 plus episodes can it?
So, Joe Gorga is going to be on a billboard for a place called Sizzletan. The best thing about it, is that Teresa did a commercial for Sizzletown a few years ago! And they showed footage from it. It was the best, most horrible thing I have ever seen in my entire life. Joe wants Melissa to be on the billboard with him, but she bows out. Melissa astutely points out that Teresa did the commercial first and she doesn't want to disturb their fragile peace by being accused of further copying. Good on you, Melissa.
Melissa has a lot on her plate though. I mean, she's an author for God's sake. She has a lot to do and it's time for the most important part of the writing process: the book cover photo shoot! We were treated to a nice montage of scenes from both of the Gorgas photo shoots cut together. Melissa loves a giant fan! Joe loves being shirtless and hoisting up the bikini clad model that isn't Melissa! This photo shoot is going as poorly as Melissa's album cover photo shoot from last season. Remember when Melissa wanted to be a singer? Simpler times.
It's time for Rosie to find a girlfriend. So, we're treated to a delightful lesbian mixer where the Gorgas and Wakiles tried to find Ro a lady to settle down with or at least scissor for the evening. It didn't go great. Between Melissa finding the swingers and Ro getting so drunk she sort of turns off the one lady lover in the crowd she was interested in, it didn't go the best. I have hope though! Seriously, Rosie is awesome and deserves to break her seven year sexless streak.
We were treated to a Twilight Zone moment, when the Gorga/Giudices were having a functional family dinner and the Manzos were having a dysfunctional family dinner. Caroline was talking to Albie and Chris about the opening of Little Town, their new restaurant, and she made the mistake of using phrases like "work too hard", which apparently are Al's trigger words. Has Al always been a dick? I mean, from what I remember, Al was always kind of a loveable guy. Yeah, he worked too hard, but he did it for his family. This lashing out at Caroline about busting everyone's balls was not a good look, and based on the looks of his children after he was done, they agree with me. Albie is for sure concerned, because he has a private dinner with Caroline where he voices those concerns. Caroline shuts it down right away. She is a little gentler to Albie's face, than she is in her private interview, basically saying he needs to mind his business. Is there trouble in Manzo paradise?
Jacqueline is still the conductor of the crazy train, but she seemed to make some progress this week. It was definitely touch and go. When Melissa and Caroline were filling her in on what went down during the retreat, her eyes were bugging out so much, I thought they were going to pop out of her head. Caroline even told her the deal that she made with Teresa to do the trust fall. Jacqueline is quiet and I'm thankful for that. I'm not sure if I can handle anymore comments about bleached assholes or masturbation. It seems like Caroline and Kathy are the only ones that can clearly see that Jacqueline is in trouble. In her private interview, Caroline calls her sister-in-law, "a complete time bomb." Uh-oh.
Then, it happens. Teresa calls her ex-BFF and they set up a time to meet, bringing along their respective spouses. We were then subjected to some more baffling behavior from Juicy Joe on the way to the meeting. Wasn't it Juicy who was encouraging Tre to get over this and make amends? Tearing up because of her and lamenting how much he missed his friendship with Chris? Now, he's calling Chris a "momo?" I assume this is some sort of gay slur. Why is Chris a momo? Because he loves his wife and children and doesn't cheat on Jacqueline. I mean, if that's the case, most men should aspire to be momo's. Jesus. I hate this guy. I sort of hope he gets deported.
Do they always meet at the same restaurant? The restaurant that Teresa and Jacqueline go to looks a lot like the restaurant that Caroline and Teresa met at in the second episode. Maybe Teresa has a deal with the management? The men go one way and the women go the other. And it's time for the main event.
Teresa lays into Jacqueline from the get go. She starts off with again accusing Jacqueline of ruining her relationship with her brother and Melissa, which is ludicrous. She brings up Twitter and Danielle Staub and calls Jacqueline an evil person. I was worried about Jacqueline at first. When Teresa first starts in, her left eye starts twitching and I'm hoping there is nothing with a sharp edge on the table. Jacqueline recovers and handles herself pretty well. She owns up to her immature tweeting. I mean, if you follow Jacqueline on Twitter, you know her Tweets read like they were sent by Honey Boo Boo fresh off a go go juice bender. I'm not sure why Teresa brings up Jacqueline reading all of Danielle's court records. Teresa was right there in the thick of that. That is my main issue with Teresa. She is a humongous hypocrite.
Jacqueline does slip up once by calling Teresa a sociopath. Teresa doesn't know what that means, but luckily her personal assistant, Siri, is on the case. For the most part, Jacqueline acquits herself well here. She owns up to some of the mistakes shes made and doesn't go for Teresa's glitter filled extensions when she calls her evil. Of course, the episode ended mid confrontoation, so we'll have to wait until next week to see how it all shakes out.
So, what did you guys think? Are you ready to shill for Sizzletan? Are you judging Melissa's book by the cover shoot? Are Caroline and Al in trouble? If Jacqueline and Teresa make up, who will fight? Will the show be worth watching? Was Kathy in this episode? Sound off in the comments.
Lady GaGa hates hackers and she hates leakers. She even tried to enlist Katy Perry to grab a bat and go fuck some up via Twitter. Over the weekend, leakers struck. Katy's whole single, "Roar" was leaked on Saturday, so she bumped up the release date by a day, making it available on Monday for download. GaGa only suffered some snippets that were removed pretty quickly, but it was enough. It was a full fledged pop music emergency, as Mother Monster decided to release the full single over a week early. So, if you love divas and pop music, Monday was a pretty good day.
What of the singles themselves? "Roar" is a thumping, empowerment anthem, along the lines of "Firework" or Sara Bareilles' "Brave" which it bears a striking similarity to. Someone has even mashed the two songs together and they are pretty seamless. All in all, it's not a bad song, and I don't really hate if two songs sound similar. I'm sure "Brave" sounds like another song that's out there, too. I don't think Katy Perry sat down and thought, "I'm going to rip off Sara Bareilles."
"Applause" is the better of the two songs. It doesn't sound like anything off of "Born This Way" which is good. I want ARTPOP to be better than "Born This Way." I want GaGa to keep challenging herself and be on the cutting edge, and I think this is a good first taste of that. The chorus is great, it's glam, it's electronic, it's what everyone is looking for in a Lady GaGa single.
Both divas released the lyric videos for their respective singles. They showed two things, that Katy Perry is crazy for emoji's and GaGa is crazy for drag queens. Check out the lyric videos below and then let me know what you think of the songs in the comments.
The Real Housewives of New Jersey, Episode 9: "On Thin Giud-ice"
Wow. Did anyone else feel like they had whiplash at the end of this episode? It took a lot of abrupt right turns and by the end of the episode the only relationship that hadn't mended was the broken friendship of Jacqueline and Teresa. So, how did the Gorga/Giudice/Wakile clan mend their busted fences? It seems we can thank Dr. V.
We pick up right where left off. Brother and sister are crying and airing out issues upstairs with Dr. V, she of the magical Italian vagina. Melissa is downstairs spilling to Caroline what happened before she got there. Melissa is letting Caroline know that Teresa was still placing all the blame for the dissolution of the relationship with her brother on Jacqueline. Now, I get why Melissa is doing this. At this point it is still very much, Melissa vs. Teresa. And let's be real, even if Dr. V is able to put this fractured family back together, Melissa and Teresa will always be slightly combative. So, right now, Melissa wants Caroline on her side and what better way to do that than to tell Caroline all about how Teresa was trashing Caroline's sister-in-law. Caroline was not going to let herself get roped into this mess. She called bullshit on Teresa in front of Melissa and in her interview.
Dr. V interrupts this convo to tell Melissa that it was time to face the music. Melissa agrees and follows Dr. V upstairs. Ro offers her a high five and Melissa leaves her hanging! Come on, Melissa. Get your head in the game.
So, it's major therapy time and a lot of stuff happens relatively quickly. Melissa airs her grievances with Joe. There is talk of tweeting and Teresa always being present when rumors about Melissa are being spread. It is basically all of the shizz that we have heard time and time again with these two. The difference this time? Dr. V. I had my doubts about Dr. V when she first showed up, but she puts a lot of them to rest here. Everytime she opens her mouth, she lays some brutal truths on the group. First off, they like to be in conflict. They want it. Also, she shuts Tre down pretty quickly when she tries to justify or defend herself when it comes to the rumor spreading. The bottom line is that Teresa is there and she isn't defending Melissa when she should be. They need to be a united front. Then, Melissa and Teresa do one of the most shocking things I've ever seen on RHONJ. They hug. Not once, but twice. And it seemed relatively genuine. Well, as genuine as you can be on reality TV anyway.
Next, it's time to bring Juicy Joe into the family bonding. Juicy claims to be the normal one. Yikes. That's a sad state of affairs when this guy is the sane one. There is a lot of babbling here by Juicy where he just seems disinterested in the whole thing. Dr. V attempts to break down the Joes' issues. Joey looked up to Juicy, he feels betrayed, yadda, yadda, yadda. Big hugs. We're all good.
It's time for Dr. V to leave and everyone is sad, because everyone in the house wants to get a closer look at her magical, blonde vag. Even Caroline. Heck, even me. She made me a believer. Who is not so super happy that Dr. V is taking off? Kathy. Kathy wanted to be brought up to the big family therapy lovefest, but alas, poor Kathy is, as always in this group, an afterthought. Kathy does something that we don't normally see on the any show in the Real Housewives franchise. Instead of stewing, being passive aggressive, and bottling all this up to explode at a later date, she actually confronts Teresa. She tells her how she feels. She apologizes for the comments she made at last year's reunion regarding Tre's dad. Teresa, still riding the Dr. V wave, apologizes back. It seems like with this declaration of love, everything is right with the fam. For now. Now, it's time to get to the important stuff. Ice fishing, cooking, and Melissa getting naked wasted.
That's right, Melissa is done. While the boys and Rosie attempt ice fishing, she joins Kathy and Teresa in the castle's kitchen. She gives up on cooking pretty much immediately and starts to get super drunk. She doesn't care that no one else is, her kids aren't around and when your kids aren't around you drink! Melissa is one of those annoying drunks you don't want to be around because she is overly obnoxious, makes jokes that are only funny to her and constantly tells you how drunk she is. No fun. The boys and Ro come back after ice fishing is a predictable bust and they have dinner. Then, there are trust falls, where Richie decides that feeling up Rosie is the appropriate thing to do. Sometimes, I wonder who is worse, Richie or Juicy. Then, I realize, the answer to the who is worse question is always Juicy.
Teresa wants Caroline to trust fall on her, but Caroline won't unless Teresa promises to make a concerted effort to resolve things with Jacqueline. There is some overly dramatic hemming and hawing, but Teresa finally decides to do it. There is a successful trust fall and all is well.
We then are treated? to some Jacqueline and Chris action. They are out to eat and there is some disturbing talk about when they "found themselves" and a petrified sock and I'm having flashbacks to Juicy and Tre in the hot tub and I'm in the fetal position in the corner of my living room, rocking back and forth. The Lauritas talk about the Giudices and the Giudices talk about the Lauritas. The consensus seems to be the menfolk think the womenfolk should get over it and move on with their lives. Juicy even gets teary eyed, but that could be because he caught a whiff of himself. I always imagine that Joe Giudice smells of High Karate and onions. If that wouldn't make you tear up, I'm not sure what would.
So, how long do we think this peace will last? Will Caroline finally get her own story and more screen time? Will the focus now be on Jacqueline and Teresa's fractured friendship? Do you care? Hit the comments and let me know.
Lady GaGa and Katy Perry continued to amp up anticipation for their upcoming singles and albums with music leaks and teaser videos. Earlier this week, I posted about both ladies prepping their first singles in the coming weeks. They certainly aren't slowing down.
GaGa released the above picture as a tease for "Applause." What really had Little Monsters foaming at the mouth was the leak of a demo for a song called "Aura" or "Burqa." The track received mixed reviews and I have to say, I am more than a little "meh" upon the first couple of listens. The verses sort of sound like "Government Hooker" from "Born This Way." Also, the verses are pretty garbled, which could have a lot to do with it being an unfinished demo. Once the chorus hits, it's a big EDM party and it's pretty catchy. It's hard to really judge this, since it isn't complete. I also remember that when the demo for "Bad Romance" leaked everyone was hating on it. So, who's to say what will happen? Have a listen and decide for yourself.
Katy Perry continued to drop inventive, sly teaser videos for her new single "Roar." In the first we are treated to a funeral. There are two girls in the front row wearing lavender wigs. The camera pans the mourners and Katy herself looks up and gives us a smile.
The second is probably the best of the three that have been released, featuring a carnivorous white cat. At the end of the second video, you'll get a taste of the hook and we may have an earworm on our hands.
Check out the videos below and let me know which is your favorite and tell me what you think of "Aura/Burqa."
The Real Housewives of New Jersey, Episode 8: "Scum One, Scum All"
I think the reason why people find The Real Housewives of New Jersey so compelling and so watchable is because that most of the drama revolves around family. There is no drama more relatable to people than family drama. We have all been there and there is no one we fight more passionately with than family. I think that we can all relate with what is happening with the Giudice/Gorga/Wakiles. Even if you have never accused your sister-in-law of being a stripper or got into a brawl with your brother-in-law in a castle, chances are you have had a deep rift with a family member at one time, and I think, watching this, we all go back to that time.
So, in this episode, we saw the actual brawl between the Joes, the immediate fallout and the beginning of a possible mending of relationships with the help of Bravolebrity, Dr. V. Since this was not your typical RHONJ episode, Jacqueline didn't even appear, I am going to do this recap a little differently. I'm going to structure it around some of my favorite quotes from the episode.
"He's biting my nuts!" - Joe Giudice
So, Joe Gorga barrels into Juicy hitting him at the knees. It is at this point that all hell breaks loose and everyone starts to freak out. Melissa and Richie and Rosie go for the Joes and attempt to break them up. Teresa flees from the room, ignoring Melissa's cries to help her brother. Juicy claims that Joey is biting his nuts. Now, if he was doing this, I wouldn't be surprised, but who knows? Lord knows the cameramen were zooming in as close as they could, but I didn't see any ball biting. If any eagle eyed blog viewers happened to catch some, please let me know in the comments. Where did Teresa go? Why to get the police of course or castle security, more likely. "Castle security." There are two words that I never thought I'd have to type. So, they finally get the Joe's torn apart, more verbal slurs are thrown, and right now, it's not looking good for any kind of long term reconciliation.
Black shit.
This isn't a quote, but after the brawl it seemed like everyone involved was covered with some black substance. There was a fun montage of everyone wondering what this could be. Joe Gorga doesn't know and he rips his shirt off furiously. Melissa is confused. Richie and Juicy don't know. Cut to Joe Gorga's interview. It turns out that Joe is going gray, so he spray paints his hair black to cover it up and that when they were fighting it smeared off his head and onto everyone else. I got a good chuckle from that and it was nice.
Kathy's nose
This is not a quote, either. Sue me. It was pretty funny when Kathy made the comment she stayed away from the fight, because she didn't want to break her new nose. I sort of love Kathy. You can't fault her reasoning. That nose was not cheap. Fuck the test kitchen, that nose is Kathy's prized possession.
"We've hit rock bottom." - Melissa Gorga
Some would argue that you all hit rock bottom a long time ago, but it was pretty clear in this episode. After the fight, there was a lot of talk about everyone just calling the whole thing off. Melissa was upset that Teresa wasn't helping her pull the two Joes apart, going so far as to call her sister-in-law the devil. I mean, I would argue that Teresa actually did the right thing by going to get the security guards. We were also visited one more time by Steve and Stephanie, the worst teambuilders in the entire world. They spew some ridiculous platitudes that no one listens to, including me. Then, just when you thought you can't get any lower, we are treated to a scene of Teresa and Joe canoodling in the hot tub. A skeevy room service guy comes in and he is obvs checking out Teresa's rack, who judging by the blur action, is having a bit of a nip slip. I am not a huge fan of watching the Giudices preparing to bump uglies and I could have gone my whole life without hearing about Juicy's masturbation schedule.
"I think I might need your help." - Teresa Giudice
When Teresa picked up the phone to call for help, I half expected her to call Gia and tell her to hop on her bike and get to Lake George. I mean, she was instrumental in setting up the season premiere play date. Alas, it was not to be. Instead, she called Caroline. She told Caroline all about the fight and asked her if she would come to Lake George since Joe had originally reached out to Caroline to begin with. This really appealed to Caroline's natural inclination to meddle, so she packed her bag and headed for the castle, despite Lauren's protests. Hey, if Caroline ends up getting murdered or gets hit by some of Juicy's jizz, don't blame Lauren. She tried.
"Don't let the blonde hair fool you. I'm Italian where it counts. My vagina." - Dr. V
Teresa only trusts pretty people and Italians so thank God that Dr. V is hot and Italian. Teresa doesn't trust her at first, because, there are no blonde Italians. Dr. V assures her that her lady parts are full Guido. I'm not sure what this means, but it seems to reassure Teresa. I'm not sure if she means the carpet doesn't match the drapes, so her pubes are dark or if her vagina can make a mean marinara. It's weird. It's also not what you would expect a therapist to say. Then I remembered, this is Bravo. It's all making sense now.
"Doctor V, you're a miracle worker. Work your magic." - Joe Gorga
So, Doctor V attempted to work her magic, but it wasn't working very well. She sat down for dinner with the family, but Melissa was being particularly uncooperative. She wouldn't say anything in front of Melissa. I don't think Melissa understands how therapy works. Dr. V, despite her casual F bombs and magical super Italian vajay, is not one of Melissa's girlfriends who will titter about Teresa behind her back. Teresa isn't much better. When Dr. V takes Joe Gorga and Teresa for a private session, Teresa's shrieky tears with no actual teardrops are not convincing. Dr. V makes some compelling points about the siblings spending time together and having each other's backs, but it doesn't look like it is going to go anywhere.
What did you guys think? Did you miss Jacqueline? Was Caroline helpful? Will Dr. V successfully bring this family back together? Are you Italian? Is showing people your vagina how you silence doubters? Let me know in the comments.
So, the next big season for music is the fall. The dog days of summer are upon us and along with the devasting and oppressive heat, we are also left with hardly any new music to get excited about. Luckily, September will change all that, especially if you are a fan of big time pop divas, since two have announced they have new albums on the way and one more just might.
Lady GaGa had been radio silent for quite some time. Earlier this year, Little Monsters were heartbroken when Mother Monster had to prematurely end her Born This Way Ball Tour due to hip surgery. During her recovery, GaGa was uncharacteristically quiet. She didn't tweet much. A picture of her wheelchair here, a congrats tweet on the day the marriage equality decision was handed down by the Supreme Court. There was talk that GaGa was in the studio working on the follow up Born This Way, the much anticipated ARTPOP. Rolling Stone talked to EDM producer, Zedd, who was working with the Lady Germanotta, and he was very enthusiastic. Fans were salivating. Slowly, GaGa began making a return to the spotlight. She gave an impassioned speech and a flawless a capella rendtion of "The Star Spangled Banner" at NYC's Gay PRIDE Festival. Then, suddenly, her Twitter account was shut down. It was not to last. A few days later, the announcment was made. Lady GaGa would be releasing her next single on August 19th and ARTPOP would be released on November 11th. Swoon. Following in the footsteps of Bjork and JAY Z, GaGa would also be releasing an app meant to enhance the ARTPOP experience.
GaGa has been busy amping up anticipation for her single drop. It was announced that she would be returning to the MTV Video Music Awards at the end of this month for her single's first live performance. She also released this image that has nothing to do with the single, but is singularly awesome.
Shortly after she released this image, GaGa officially announced that the first single off of ARTPOP would be "Applause." She also released the single artwork that is heavily influenced by the cover of David Bowie's 1980 album, "Scary Monsters (and Super Creeps)." Check out the single artwork.
She also took a video of herself getting her septum pierced and recently tweeted a pic of her with band (and hopeful collabarators), She Wants Revenge. So, Little Monsters, the era of ARTPOP is upon us. Applause. August 19. #16days
Not to be outdone, Katy Perry announced this week that she will be releasing the follow up to her massively successful, career defining sophomore album, "Teenage Dream," in a very understated way.
Yes, a gold semi drove around LA to announce that Katy would be releasing over two weeks before GaGa. The way she made the announcement drew a rave review from Adam Lambert on Twitter. He probably direct messaged her to find out where he could get one.
Katy also released a teaser video to announce the first single from "Prism." In the moody video, Katy is serving Morticia Addams realness, as she sets fire to the blue wig that is a stand in for the "Teenage Dream" era. At the end, we get the announcement. Roar. August 12. Check out the video for yourself.
So, which of the dueling divas albums are you most excited to hear? GaGa or Katy Perry? Or are you holding out hope that Britney will throw her hat into the fall music ring? Let me know in the comments.
