Monday, August 25, 2014

The Real Housewives of Orange County Recap: Our Next Guest...

The Real Housewives of Orange County, Episode 9: "Not a Good Day L.A."


You guys, we need to talk about Lizzie.  Seriously.  Sometimes I forget that she is even a part of the show. What did she do this episode?  Judge some random beauty pageant?  Talks about how she wants to have a another baby, but doesn't want to give up her career?  I'm asking because I took notes and I still don't remember.  Compelling stuff!  To be fair, I like Lizzie.  She's fun, she's pretty, she's smart.  Her husband has edged out Mauricio and Eddie for hottest Housewife spouse, but if she doesn't do something to make herself stand out and fast, she'll be a one season wonder.

Thursday, August 21, 2014

The Real Housewives of New Jersey Recap: The Password Is Crotch

The Real Housewives of New Jersey, Episode 2: "O, Christmas Tre"


Who wants to be a member of the Marchese family?  Seriously.  Their kids are going to grow up to be seriously messed up.  It's Christmas time in Jersey, but it's not all fun and games.  Disasters happen and the Marchese's want their kids to be ready for anything.  And what better way to prepare them then with the fire drill that launched a thousand future therapy sessions.  How else to explain all this craziness?  A collapsible ladder out the window, Jim demonstrating how "safe" it is.  To be fair, when Jim was dangling out the window there was a look that flashed over Amber's face that said, maybe we are taking this too far. Amber did say she used to hate kids and I'm thinking maybe she still does.  Maybe  that helps explain why she didn't stop the craziness, like when she was blowing the air horn and telling the little ones that they have killed the dog and now mommy and daddy have burned to a crisp.  Merry Christmas, Marchese children.  There won't be sugar plums dancing in your head on Christmas Eve, instead it will be the charred corpses of your parents dancing while you cry.

Monday, August 18, 2014

The Real Housewives of New York City Recap: Off to the Races

The Real Housewives of New York City, Episode 13: "Win, Place or Sonja"


Shortly after this episode aired, I really railed against George.  He's an old pervert who gets away with his ridiculous behavior because of his age.  I mean, I detest Ramona most of the time, but does she deserve to be talked to that way?  Does she deserve to have someone say that if she died he would go to her funeral and fondle her corpse?  And why isn't Aviva doing anything about this?  If Aviva wants to be buddy buddy with Ramona, why is she allowing her father to treat her "friends" this way?  We'll get into that more later.  

When I was on a Housewives fansite (don't judge me!) railing against George's uncouth behavior, a commenter brought up Sad Sonja, who was especially sad this episode, again, more on that later.  Sonja has dated a 23 year old this season and we have seen her hit on multiple barely legal boys, but no one seems to be batting an eyelash.  People laugh it off.  Sonja's crazy.  It's who she is.  Granted, she's not flashing her vagina or rubbing it against people's legs, but she should be absolved.  Is she just as much of a perv as George, but she gets a pass?

Personally, I think Sonja is not as bad as George.  She is ridiculous, but relatively harmless.  George is touching women with his hands and other... things.  Not cool.  And there is no excuse.  Just because he is over 80 doesn't mean that he should be exempt from common decency.

Tuesday, August 5, 2014

The Real Housewives of Orange County Recap: With Friends Like These...

The Real Housewives of Orange County, Episode 8: "Not So Silent Night'


Viewer's don't seem to care for Tamra Judge.  I have been a fan.  She definitely stirs the pot and causes drama and is ridiculous, but isn't that what people want in a Housewife?  Isn't it boring if you just sit there and do nothing?  (Hello, Lizzie!  I didn't see you there.)  This season though, Tamra is getting on my nerves.  You'd think, when a friend does something nice for you, like invite you on the show they are guest hosting to promote your business, wouldn't you be grateful?  Not Tamra.  When Vicki Gunvalson becomes the voice of reason in a situation, then  you know there is a problem.  So let's take a look at what all went down at Shannon's not so happy holiday party.