RuPaul's Drag Race Recap: Is This America's Next Top Model?

RuPaul's Drag Race, Episode 2: "RuPaul's Big Opening, Part 2"

RuPaul continued his two part premiere Monday night by introducing us to the other seven queens that will be vying for the title of "America's Next Drag Superstar."  This was more like it!  I felt that the first part of the premiere was a little lackluster.  The queens didn't impress much and it was a little bit of a letdown.  These new queens were head and shoulders above the first six.  Seriously.  Bring over Ben DeLaCreme and the other bitches can get to steppin'.  There were quite a few contenders for the crown and only a couple of out and out and duds.  So, just like we did last week, let's rank the queens from least to most likely to win it all.  

7.  Magnolia Crawford (pictured above)  What will I miss about Magnolia Crawford?  I will definitely miss the way Ru said her name.  Maaaaggggnooooolllliiiiaaa  Crawford.  Tht's about it.  Magnolia wasn't feeling it and you could tell.  I'm not even sure how she got cast?  That contoured nose was awful.  She was so upset with the party box that she got.  Most queens would love a party themed hoe down box and you think it would be perfect for a queen named Magnolia, but no.  Everything was shit.  She walked the runway in her cow patterned dress and thought that she deserved a medal because she wore a bow on her ass.  She was defensive and terrible and I've already wasted too much time on her.  Sayonara skank.

6.  Darienne Lake

Darienne Lake is this season's token big girl and she was the winner of the online Facebook fan voting contest.  Darienne was exhausting.  It wouldn't have been so bad if she was funny, but out of the fifty jokes that she made only one was actually clever.  Darienne's St. Patrick's Day inspired outfit was a hot mess.  Seriously, it looked like something you'd find off the sale rack at Torrid five years ago.  It also led to me finding out way more than I ever wanted to know about Khloe Kardashian, the extra special guest judge.  Seriously, I don't want to hear about your humongous camel toe.  Also, are you sure it's not really just a penis?  Maybe your parents have lied to you all this time.  Darienne did lip sync for her life, but let's be honest, she could have just stood there and did nothing and Magnolia still would have sashayed away.

5.  Joslyn Fox

Is Joslyn Fox as dumb as she seems she is?  I mean, she is beautiful, but really girl?  She made that terrible Ihop joke, she didn't know what a dark horse was, it all seemed really over the top.  No one can be that dumb can they?  Does she think that makes her cute or endearing?  It doesn't.    Joslyn was also fangirling out when it came to semi-famous contestant Courtney Act.  Watch out, Cort.  You may get single white female-d.  There were major issues with Joslyn's outfit.  She was given the quinceanera party box and it was a definite case of more is more.  In the last episode, Adam Lambert was a little soft on April because he wanted to fuck her.  Is that why Santino didn't read Joslyn for her awful outfit?  Would he let her lick his bald head.  You're welcome for that image.

4.  Trinity K. Bonet

There is nothing particularly wrong with Trinity.  She is pretty.  She has a good body.  She just has no personality.  She sort of reminds me of season 2 winner, Tyra Sanchez.  I think Tyra won because it was the second season and Ru didn't realize that it was the queens that were funny and fishy and fierce that people actually rooted for.  Trinity needs to show some more sides of herself if she wants to make it past a sixth or seventh place finsh.  I will give her props for her princess couture.  She really took it in an unexpected direction.  I loved her Star Wars inspired princess look.  It would have been easy for her to go the pretty in pink route.  If Trinity can keep it up, she may prove me wrong.

3.  Milk

Oh Milk.  This conceptual club kid from NYC made quite the first impression.  She had her gap toothed smile and toilet paper on her shoe.  She was not your typical drag queen and this could go really well for Milk or really poorly.  She struggled a little bit with her first photo shoot.  I don't think that Milk has many chances or cares to be very sexy, which isn't necessarily a bad thing.  Milk got the toga party box and Ru was definitely a little unsure when she said she was going to do pants, because of the dreaded moose knuckle effect.  Milk started to go a little off the rails when she told the other queens that she was going to walk the runway with a beard on.  I hope that Milk is able to stay true to her cool, out there aesthetic, but not take it too far.  Her outfit was on point and it would have coveyed who she was without the facial hair.  If Milk can walk that line, she can go far.

2.  Courtney Act

Damn.  Courtney is beautfiul.  She looks like a lady and that is very impressive.  I do have a problem with queens thinking that because a queen like Courtney is super fishy that's not "drag."  Courtney has a dick.  He's a boy in a dress.  He's doing drag.  Courtney was a finalist on the first season of Austrailian Idol and according to him he is a household name in his native land.  I'm going to take his word for it.  Courtney could skate by on her beauty, but that would only take her so far.  Luckily, she has really bubbly, effervescent personality.  She is self deprecating.  Her downfall may be that she doesn't really sew.  She almost pulled a Laganja on the runway and slipped on her train.  I love a train, but maybe shorten 'em up a little ladies.

1.  Bianca Del Rio

I love Bianca Del Rio.  She is such a bitch.  She is hilarious.  I need a rolodex of hate, just saying.  Bianca was on from the moment that she entered the workroom when she proclaimed she wanted to show America that there are drag queens that have good hair and nice teeth.  The zingers didn't stop there as she surveyed her competition.  My favorite was when Joslyn entered the workroom.  "It looks like she walked into Claire's Boutique, fell on a sale rack and said I'll take it!"  Bianca gives it to herself as much as she gives it to the other queens, referring to herself as "clown realness."  Bianca can sew too.  She used to work for a Broadway costumer and her craftsmanship showed.  Her luau inspired outfit was the hands down winner and right now, Ms. Del Rio is my pick to win it all.

So, what did you guys think?  Did you prefer these queens or the first set?  Do you have a favorite yet? Let me know in the comments.